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privatelylustful[The world is new and he is new. There are all sorts of new instincts swimming through his mind - new words and ideas and thoughts that swim through his body. He's less bothered by his beautiful wings molting. There are new feathers growing in and they are gorgeous. Blue and green and purple with a glorious gold and purple and blue eye on the edge of each feather.
Somehow none of it matters and all of it matters but he has his rules and his things to do. It is a dry desert and the only person who can make it bloom belongs to him.
It's only fair. He has saved them and if his brother asked he would be with him with these new skills and these new feelings. It's like he's always known these things and he's seen humans do this. There's a vague memory of agreeing to it, of angels and demons sitting at a table to discuss how humans operate.
It's worth questioning.
If these are instincts for humans that he is somehow coming to understand. Wrapped in a black and gold loincloth, he stands a few feet away and watches her work.]
...The world only blooms for two people. For Her - and for you. [He smiles, and it's one full of innocence. He is crafted to be perfect and unlike his brother, he remains still beautiful. Still beloved.
Even if he doesn't feel like it anymore.]
...You have a wonderful gift.
Somehow none of it matters and all of it matters but he has his rules and his things to do. It is a dry desert and the only person who can make it bloom belongs to him.
It's only fair. He has saved them and if his brother asked he would be with him with these new skills and these new feelings. It's like he's always known these things and he's seen humans do this. There's a vague memory of agreeing to it, of angels and demons sitting at a table to discuss how humans operate.
It's worth questioning.
If these are instincts for humans that he is somehow coming to understand. Wrapped in a black and gold loincloth, he stands a few feet away and watches her work.]
...The world only blooms for two people. For Her - and for you. [He smiles, and it's one full of innocence. He is crafted to be perfect and unlike his brother, he remains still beautiful. Still beloved.
Even if he doesn't feel like it anymore.]
...You have a wonderful gift.
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Date: 2019-12-19 05:24 am (UTC)[There's energy between them and his mind fills in the blank lust but she says she wants him and the only person - the only being who has ever said that was her.
The only being that has ever wanted him was her.
The hole in his heart, in his soul, is profound. Nothing will ever fill it. That's his cross to bear long before crosses exist. This...This comes close.]
...We could just...
Sit here but...
I could make you feel so good...
[His kiss presses to her again and it's deep. Deeper then anything he's offered her before before he pulls back and cups her cheek, looking into her eyes.
There's nothing but love there, in his golden gaze. He looks like the angel he once was.]
...I don't want you to be sad.
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Date: 2019-12-19 05:32 am (UTC)( and she trusts him. he's only ever offered her kindness, wanted to protect her and lift her up, she doesnt feel like he could hurt her )
I want you to but--
( she flusters on her words, the woman with a careful confidence becoming slowly bolder is very nervous under his touch, head dipping slightly as if she's embarrassed to meet his gaze as she admits this )
I don't know what it'll be like. I know that you're kind but-- I'm afraid.
( there's impulses in her body wanting this, her own thoughts telling her yes-- she needs to relax, to feel secure in that as she does just being with him. because she knows he'll be gentle with her )
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Date: 2019-12-19 05:46 am (UTC)[Taking himself in his hand, briefly, staring down at it, he shudders in response before pulling away quickly.]
I've never...done anything like this before. My brother - Lucifer - He told me that this was my calling. That I was supposed to...to know these things and make sure they were punished if they did it wrong...
[He pauses] ...Did someone make you afraid?
[A dilemma forms in his mind. There is someone who could cause fear - who mingled love and fear and heartbreak - but if he had hurt her he would be unable to protect her...his hands stop stroking her breasts for a moment. His wings are in an in-between stage. Not quite angel, not quite demon, they smell like sandalwood - like musk and spices and a faint under smell of fire.
He shifts her so she's inches away from him, eyes lowered.]
I will never hurt you or make you afraid and if I do you can kill me. Holy water kills us you know that.
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Date: 2019-12-19 05:53 am (UTC)( and that thought hurts her, the thought of losing him and it's reflected in her expression.
but he'd asked her question and as much as lilith avoids talking about the garden-- this she needs to talk about, so he can help her, can protect her against it )
Adam wanted to do this, tried to.
( she'd refused, he'd gotten a little more forceful but it hadn't gone all of the way. with asmodeus now it feels different, it feels safer, pleasant and unlike with adam she wants this )
I know you wouldn't hurt me as he did. You're kind. And I feel safe with you.
( loved but it's a word she can't yet say )
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Date: 2019-12-20 06:44 am (UTC)But he's not. Not anymore. And she believes he can be kind? That he can't hurt people? He knows he hurt Her, that his decision to follow Lucifer down hurt her and for one moment he glances skyward. When his gaze returns to her his eyes are filled with tears.]
I don't deserve that.
[Leaning forward, lips to hers, forehead pressed to hers, his hand finds the nape of her neck and strokes it gently.]
But ...Thank you.
[They laugh. They talk and he can't stop watching her and is this her or is this some perverse new instinct because he...
The next words are mumbled despite the growing need between his legs. Ignoring his own wellspring of emotions he meets her gaze and tries, tries to pour as much love as a demon can into the world between them.]
I don't want to ruin you. I don't want to ruin or destroy you because I think you - you might be the most beautiful thing - the most beautiful thing I've seen in a very, very long time...
[He wants to babble but instead he kisses her again to shut himself up. He could die here. Now. Happy.]
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Date: 2019-12-20 06:59 am (UTC)but she's also hsppy to kiss him, a tempting probe with her tongue against his lips, mimicking what he'd done earlier, deepening the kiss.
and this time she kisses him until her lungs burn, a gasped breath for air before she kisses him again, briefer this time until she no longer can kiss him, heavy breaths as she rests her forehead against him.
seconds pass of lilith just catching her breath. and then she shifts slightly, little raise of her hips, her hand moving between them and taking his cock )
I want this. You.
( because to her he's not ruining her but freeing her. though her nerves had calmed under the kissing they rise a little now that she's doing it but lilith takes a breath. and slowly she lowers herself onto him.
there's a small sound that lilith tries to conceal, the pain of taking him in. it's not just that he's large but because she's not relaxed enough, nerves causing her body to tense up, making her tighter than she already should be and it means that she can't take much of him in, that it's uncomfortable. but she doesn't know how it should feel, assumes that it'll feel better because why else would she want this?
lilith kisses him again, letting herself get used to the feel of him in her before she slowly rocks her hips )
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Date: 2019-12-21 12:08 am (UTC)She is warm and alive and living and this celestial thing in a human body wants to weep. His fingers find her hair on instinct as he thrusts - a half hearted movement into her because that noise of pain and - did it hurt?
Could something like this, truly like this, hurt?
Later, much later, when he is old and bitter and nothing is good and new he will know that yes, it can, but here and now there is only the two of them and he loves humanity. It was all worth it for them, for her, for these strange funny little beings who were so capable...
As she grinds, rocking atop him, he drags his kisses from her lips, down her jaw to her neck planting gentle sucking bites and kisses along her collarbone. A fleeting thought passes his mind - if Lucifer sees - if he knows - but it's gone in a haze. She is hers and he is hers and they are one here and now and the hole in his soul feels like it's being filled up.
As she grinds, his own motion picks up. She at least has some experience - perhaps - she knows what goes where - so he should follow her yes? Follow her lead, thank her for this because all he knows is how to praise other beings...
His mouth is throaty and breath dry and hot as he pulls away from her skin.]
I love you so much.
[Before he is back, to kiss and bite, like a kitten, like a tiger.]
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Date: 2019-12-21 12:29 am (UTC)there'd been an instinct in her that had told her it would be good, that made this seem like a wonderful idea but part of her's now wondering if that were another false idea by god and men to get her to do what they wanted, for them to have their pleasure (because adam had certainly want this) and for her to bear the consequence from it. pain. children.
but-- asmodeus isn't adam. his thrusts are slow, he's still kissing her and-- then he tells her that he loves her.
it brings her back to him, firm kiss at his lips, her heart pouring into him. and she grinds a little quicker, a little more effort which presses more of him into her. the kiss stops her from sounding, the only indication perhaps being in the increased pressure of her fingers on the back of his head. but she keeps up her new pace, not wanting to disappoint him, trying to chase that promised pleasure her instinct had told her about )
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Date: 2019-12-21 12:42 am (UTC)No. Her body is tense and it feels so good and she let him do this.
Press her. Take her. She's yours. Some brand new demonic instinct fills his mind and he cups her face in his hands before his eyes rolls back in his head and he gently, gently increases his speed.
His feathers ruffle and tighten around her.]
...I love you, I love you, I love you-
[His teeth close on her shoulder, it's still gentle but it may or may not draw blood.]
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Date: 2019-12-21 12:57 am (UTC)I can't--
( her hips still rock because she wants this, she doesn't want to stop, it has to feel better--
but it's too much, a sob hitting the air. and she stops, her hands slipping down from his head, resting at the back of his neck, the rest of her entirely still, afraid to move )
I'm sorry. ( it's a whisper, lilith trying to hold back her tears, fearing that she's disappointed him or even that he'll be angry. she knows that isn't what he's really like but-- it didn't go right, it had to be her fault ) I can't-- I'm sorry.
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Date: 2019-12-21 01:04 am (UTC)Oh no. It's so wrong. He has done so much wrong he always does wrong but to her, here and now...
He can make this right. He can't make his fall right. He can never make that right but that doesn't change that he loves Her and misses her. For this woman however, the first of her creations...
It's sloppy as he pulls himself out, practically grabbing himself despite the pained noise before raising a hand to her face.Shifting his hips, he pulls her down beside him, resting on a bed of his non-essential feathers. She's surrounded in blue and green and yellow eyes but his own are panicked.]
...Was it me?
You can tell me. I-
I know. I know I hurt people. I mean I fell but I know...I know...I love you so much I'm so sorry...
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Date: 2019-12-21 01:15 am (UTC)she hears his words but she can't reply, needing to just cry for a moment. (she's also bleeding a little from trying to press him in but that goes unnoticed, something that will stop before too long).
it's a couple of minutes before lilith's emotions calm enough, her body stilling again as her sobs subside, seconds more before she whispers-- )
You didn't do anything wrong.
( he'd done exactly as she'd asked, everything that she'd wanted. she'd taken him, she'd acted first-- he'd stopped when she'd asked too, comforted her in his arms, protected her throughout the whole thing. she knew that he loved her, that he didn't want to hurt her )
It was supposed to be beautiful but-- maybe that's only for the man. A pleasure for them.
( she'd never been granted any pleasures before, why would she think she could have this one? )
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Date: 2019-12-21 01:34 am (UTC)[There's something strange and ethereal in his voice, something that sounds inhuman for a moment before he exhales and inhales. When his eyes find hers they are white and gold.
That fades.]
...It can't be. I mean why would she make us in her image, you in her image, if she intended such things.
Besides. It's like an instinct. My brother has given me my domain and it is to be...the body and it's facets. It is to be all of this.
[He strokes the space between them as she lays on his feathers]
It terrifies me. I have it in me to be crueler now...so if it-If it is me...
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Date: 2019-12-21 01:43 am (UTC)You keep saying that you're cruel, that you think you could ruin me--
( and whilst yes he had hurt her it hadn't been an intentional thing, something that lilith didn't even believe was his fault )
And yet to me you've been nothing but kind, wanting only to care. To love. Look at yourself, Asmodeus. See who you are, not what he tells you you are.
( just as lilith refused to be what everyone else had tried to make her. but the thought causes her to sigh because-- she's right. it isn't him and she wasn't meant for this pleasure )
She may have made me in her image but she also intended me to submit, to serve my husband and please him. She refused me my own choices, no doubt would refuse me pleasure too.
( or perhaps it was her punishment, that something that should have been pleasurable would only cause her pain now. even so-- )
I don't want that to be it. Perhaps you're right and I can find that bliss. ( therefore implying that she'd take him again ) But I want it to be with you.
( no one else. she was not afraid even if it would cause her pain. he should at least find that joy even if she were denied it. she loved him, she'd give him it willingly )
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Date: 2019-12-21 05:08 am (UTC)Don't you want to play music brother? Don't you want to compose your own hymns to the spheres? To go where your feet tell you? This is what I will give you.
But it was hot, and it was cold, and his voice no longer sang. She made choice sound attractive. When he smiles at her his teeth look almost fanged but he hides it with a caress to her cheek. His eyes adore her swinging one leg gently over hers so they are together even if they are not together but...]
You're making choice sound attractive again-
[When she says it, I want to be with you the first thought he thinks is - But you're his except - she promises choice.]
...You mean that don't you.
[His voice is filled with wonder as he stroked her hair, his voice gentle and soft.]
...Fuck what she said. This power? Is yours. We'll be together and no one will part us.
[It feels like a painful promise but he presses his forehead to hers. It's awe and wonder that she can love him and so he says...]
I can't bless you anymore but if I could, I would bless you with the power to take what you want. But even if I can't...
[His laugh is a little grim.]
...I think you'll do it anyway.
[Something - something pulls at his mind. Demonic energy fills his mind and he shoves it away.]
Let him punish me. I don't want to leave you. I-
[He was softening between his legs but being close to her, he rolls back a hair and stares at the canopy of his own feathers.]
This hurts. This new piece of me. In a good way. IS that strange?
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Date: 2019-12-21 06:50 am (UTC)like this. it takes the forefront over punishing because really lilith doesn't want him doing that, doesn't want hum putting himself in harm's way. so when he mentions his cock--
her gaze slips down his body, eyes finding the still erect cock between his legs. it's magnificent if a little terrifying and if between her own legs didn't feel sore she'd have sat on him.
instead, her hand moves down from his cheek, travelling smooth muscle of his body before she lightly wraps her hand around his cock. and oh, does she want him between her legs, craves it almost )
You said before that I made you feel good.
( she doesn't want him to hurt, particularly not when she's the one that has caused this in him )
Let me do so.
( lilith presses a kiss to his chest before pushing herself up slightly, her gaze finding his as she rubs her hand slowly down his length, touch firmer than when she'd done this before )
Let me ease what I caused. You should know that bliss.
( even if she cant yet )