Just wanna be | wanna bewitch you in the moonlight

[privatelylustful]

[The world is new and he is new. There are all sorts of new instincts swimming through his mind - new words and ideas and thoughts that swim through his body. He's less bothered by his beautiful wings molting. There are new feathers growing in and they are gorgeous. Blue and green and purple with a glorious gold and purple and blue eye on the edge of each feather.

Somehow none of it matters and all of it matters but he has his rules and his things to do. It is a dry desert and the only person who can make it bloom belongs to him.

It's only fair. He has saved them and if his brother asked he would be with him with these new skills and these new feelings. It's like he's always known these things and he's seen humans do this. There's a vague memory of agreeing to it, of angels and demons sitting at a table to discuss how humans operate.

It's worth questioning.

If these are instincts for humans that he is somehow coming to understand. Wrapped in a black and gold loincloth, he stands a few feet away and watches her work.]

...The world only blooms for two people. For Her - and for you. [He smiles, and it's one full of innocence. He is crafted to be perfect and unlike his brother, he remains still beautiful. Still beloved.

Even if he doesn't feel like it anymore.]

...You have a wonderful gift.

Comments

[sathan]

( slowly her head lifts up, taking his words in, no longer caring how she looks because-- he wants to help her. oh, lilith knows that he loves her, he tells her every time they come together but-- to wish to heal her? it feels so much more.

and what she really wants to do is raise a hand to his cheek, to touch him, seek comfort through him but-- it's impossible from the pain.

will she ever be able to touch him again?

she attempts to take a deep breath, to sliw her sobs and breathing, thinking on his words )

Can-- do fallen angels have that power?

( did angels? she'd never really asked what being an angel meant he could do. it had never mattered to her -- she wanted him not his power. but now she feels like she should have known.

if not-- there were things in her garden that could be made into a poultice to relieve her pain, to wrap her hands in. it was all they could do )

[privatelylustful]

I should be able to.

[He spreads his wings and exhales.]

But I would have to take your hands. I can't-

I can sense your pain. At least I think it's pain. I'm dep-

I should-

I should be able to. Give me your hands.

[sathan]

( she trusts him. it's the one feeling that always keeps her here with him, that has her listening to him.

it's the thing that has her offering her hands to him. there's a second of hesitation, fear over his touch hurting but lilith trusts that he can soothe it, perhaps even heal her as she'd healed him.

and as she looks up at him her eyes are so hopeful, so full of love-- and she nods, steeling herself so that she doesn't flinch when he takes her hands, masking her pain as much as she can.

she trusts him to make it better )

[privatelylustful]

[his wings spread. They're green and gold and black and beautiful, but shielding her from him and her and a lot of her the only thing that matters is her. Well muscled and glowing gold but...

His hands massage hers. Each finger is stroked, his eyes closed, and reaches within himself. There is a space for holy energy, a space where he can pull it from and...

And...it works, but there's less. His eyes open and they glow gold but it's like a caress rather then a healing touch. His heart aches before he knows it barely worked.

No. Not barely. It did nothing. He bares a set of animal fangs and stares at the ground before growling.]

I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I'm so sorry.

[sathan]

( silent tears fall as he touches her, the pain starting off incredibly intense despite the motions of his hands that makes her heart flutter.

she can feel the magic, feel it starting to soothe-- but it's still so intense and when he pulls away her hands still throb, skin raw to look at.

and she realises why he's stopped. he can't help her.

her heart sinks at the realisation but she doesn't blame him. he'd tried to help and that means something to her.

slowly the back of her hand comes to rest on his cheek, stroking gently despite how much it hurts )

It's not your fault.

( it's hers. if she hadn't refused lucifer-- )

There's something here that will help if you can get it.

( and if he agrees she'll describe the plants to him, an instinct about what she can do )

[privatelylustful]

[Gabriel-that-was screams.

He is dead, long dead, and instead Asmodeus's gold glowing demon eyes are desperate as he sits and listens before rising and padding back with the plants she needs.]

Tell me what you need.

I love you. I love you know that. I'm not going to hurt you please.

[sathan]

( she sends him again for water, finding a larger, flat stone to work on, a second rounded one to work with, laying the plants across it )

Add a little water, enough to moisten them. Then use the stone to grind them to a paste.

( he'd need to coat her hands after, a gesture she wasn't looking forward to but if her instinct was right it would begin to soothe her pain, promote the healing process. nothing would be instantaneous but it would help )

[privatelylustful]

[It is...tedious. It's hard not to be frustrated by this. He should have been able to heal her in an instant, but of course he can't. He's no longer an angel, no longer angelic, no longer her beloved messenger because he dared to question and challenge and love.

Her love makes him come back and he smiles weakly.]

It smells good.

It's going to help you?

[sathan]

It'll ease the pain.

( that much she can guarantee. lilith knows the plants in her garden, things that had started just as fruit had slowly spread to other flowers and herbs. this wasn't the first poultice she'd made but it was the first she'd used on herself )

The healing will take time but this will help.

( unbeknownst to her she won't be left scarred, a mix between her poultices and magic, the gentle soothing healing her flawlessly. but that takes time.

her head dips slightly, biting her lip before she speaks again. she knows what she has to say will anger him but she also wants him to know. she doesn't want to be alone )

Lucifer-- told me what he desired from me. What my purpose was.

( her role, her job. her worth )

[privatelylustful]

[His brother keeps a careful court and weaves dark magic amongst them. Asmodeus has to wonder if she commanded it since Lucifer's power working on him feels almost like hers. With his mutating power he becomes something powerful and new and his brother commands he use this power. A place for everything and everything in it's place Asmodeus. Gabriel

At the mention of his brother his hands stop working and his chest clenches.]

...He commands all of us.

[His throat works, going back to grinding.]

If he hurt you-

[he keeps grinding until it looks soft and mushy, staring at her for more directions.]

[sathan]

Not yet.

( aside from her punishment but lilith knows that her refusal won't deter him, that he'll get his will regardless of her desires. he commands them all )

He wants to spread our power to the world. ( her power but mixed with his. the only fitting match, he'd claimed )

For me to bear his children. ( the last part comes as a whisper, lilith refusing to meet his gaze.

she reaches a hand to the poultice, swiping a finger through it before nodding, spreading her hands before him )

I-- ( she lifts her gaze to his again, letting him strengthen her ) I told him I'd only bear a child with someone I loved.

( which lucifer had laughed at, knowing exactly who she meant, telling her it was impossible. but to her it didn't matter, if she couldn't have a child with asmodeus then she'd have no children. except he had a different plan )

[privatelylustful]

[He has never thought about children and so he misses the point. The only one destined to have a child is Lucifer so when he stares at her his mind is blank as he raises a hand to her hair before moving slowly, slowly to take her hands.]

...I think...

You're the only one reminding me what real love is.

[He moves to slide his hands to hers, gently rubbing the paste across her fingers.]

...I love you.

[sathan]

( there's a soft sigh and she can tell from how he's looking at her that he didn't pick up on it. for all that he is wonderful and she loves him-- sometimes she forgets that angels loved in a different way than what she's used to. even though he showed her what it was to be loved )

You were my point.

( there's a pause as he works the paste across her hands, slowly coating them, the mixture slowly working its magic and soothing her pain )

I love you, Asmodeus. You are all I want.

( him and if it were possible the child with him. but it wasn't, lucifer had made that perfectly clear. there was no misunderstanding his meaning )